Okay, so this happened in fourth grade, and I was in this class with all these dumbass kids. Here’s the back story: My parents usually pack me fruit for a snack, but this time they packed me like half of the leftover Pringles from the day before, you know, in that cylinder container. I was thrilled because I LOVE PRINGLES. But when recess came, and I was ready to take MY Pringles and eat them outside, they were missing from my bag. I began searching the area, looking for my Pringles. I called the teacher over; she tried to find them but had no luck either. Then this thought comes to my mind—What if MOIRA STOLE IT? Moira was this chubby girl in my class who ALWAYS wore a purple princess dress that looked like a bad Halloween costume (seriously), and she was known for being mean. Being the judgmental 9-10 year old I was, I straight out concluded that she must’ve stolen my damn Pringles. I told my teacher, “Well, too bad, I’ll just go out for recess now. It was just PRINGLES.” Playing it cool. So I storm out of the classroom and begin looking for Moira. I mean checking different areas, questioning witnesses, wasting my time. So after a solid 10 minutes, I find a group of these kids crowded at the side of one of the portable classrooms. I rush over to see what it is. The kids were eating Pringles. Barbecue flavored Pringles. MY PRINGLES. I start raging as I smack the Pringles out of the kids’ hands and start ripping people away from the main source. And right in the middle of them all was a smug-looking MOIRA with my PRINGLES. I look all mad and rip the BLOODY EMPTY CONTAINER OF PRINGLES OUT OF THE DAMN BITCH’S FILTHY HANDS. By now, even clueless Moira knows she’s in trouble. I would’ve murdered her at the very least, but a supervisor saw us and ran over. Moira was forced to apologize and I was forced to accept her damn apology. I never got to eat my Pringles. To this day I’m sure she fears my cold dead hands, ready to rip her lying face off.